Just a little anxious...

Well, tomorrow is the big day. I have my scope/biopsies to see if I do indeed have Celiac Disease. I am both eager (to get it done and over with) and anxious (for obvious reasons).

I'm hoping to find some comfort. Comfort in just knowing. Knowing whether or not I have Celiac Disease. Whether the fatigue and pain have been all in my head or if indeed there is a physical reason for it.

Fortunately I have a wonderful husband who has taken the entire day off to be with me and a great set of parents who are going to watch our kids for the day. (Not an easy task that I take lightly!)

Although I am anxious, I do find relief in knowing that my children (and I) are all cared for.

I would appreciate your prayers for wisdom for the doctor, and for the ability to accept whatever results the test concludes. I know that God is in control. He knew that I'd be going through this before He even formed me in my mother's womb. And as His child, I know He'll be right there with me. Thank you, Lord!

As soon as I know the results of the test, I will blog all the gory details. Maybe.

THEN...maybe this will actually turn into the food blog that I'd fully intended it would be!

"PMA"

Growing up in a military household, I've been raised with a multitude of acronyms. Many of which escape me at present (sorry Dad!). One acronym does come to mind today, and that is PMA (or Positive Mental Attitude). As a somewhat melancholy natured person, I tend to focus on what's wrong, how to fix it, and then get busy fixing said problem. Since Celiac Disease was first given as a suggested diagnosis for my many symptoms, I've been searching. Searching for ways to substitute gluten in all the recipes that I can't have anymore. Breads, bagels, stuffing, cake, doughnuts, etc., etc., etc...

BUT not today! Thanks to a fabulous blog that I have checked almost daily for wonderful recipes to inspire me, I have been focusing on all the things that I CAN have! In her post today, Kate Morgan Jackson of Framed Cooks, said the following, "I'm thinking there is some pulled pork over grits in my future sometime very, very soon." DUH! Instead of having BBQ on bread, I can have BBQ over GRITS! yummy! I know she won't read this, but THANKS KATE!!! Here's just a few wonderful things that I can still have:

1. chocolate covered strawberries (which I just finished making - thank you very much!)

2. ice cream

3. grilled chicken (and just about any other meat that's not prepackaged, and some that are prepackaged!)

4. pineapple

5. kiwi

6. oranges

7. bananas (do you see a trend here?)

8. cucumbers

9. onions

10. tomatoes

11. potatoes

12. several different Mexican dishes (that use corn tortillas and not flour tortillas)

13. salad (hold the croutons please:)

14. celery with peanut butter

15. homemade salsa and corn chips

16. popcorn

17. homemade vegetable soup

18. fried eggs

19. cottage cheese

20. sliced cheese with apples

21. French fries (at home or at a restaurant like Five Guys that doesn't fry anything else in their fryers)

22. COFFEE

23. some potato chips

24. sweet tea

25. pickles

26. yogurt

27. string cheese

28. sauteed cabbage

29. baked potatoes (with lots of butter! and salt & pepper)

30. scrambled eggs

31. spaghetti squash with spaghetti sauce

32. popsicles

33. cashews

34. smoothies (we made some mango/peach/strawberry smoothies that were so refreshing last week)

35. chili (serve with corn chips and shredded cheddar for a change)

36. peppers

There! I'm thirty-six years old. So I figure that thirty-six is a good number to stop at for now. I feel better. It's amazing what a PMA can do for someone...Thanks Dad!

Food for thought

I know this is supposed to be a cooking blog. That was my full intention when I began it almost a year ago. I had fully intended on creating a food blog that would kind of chronicle my favorite hobby (mainly for my children's sake - kind of like a family cookbook of sorts). But that's not what it's bloomed into of late. It's a place where I can say out loud the things that I would like to say to others, but no one really wants to hear.

I've been "surfing the web" trying to find wonderful recipes that our entire family will enjoy once I finally go gluten-free. I have discovered an interesting GF food blog that I enjoy. Today's post was particularly interesting. The blog is authored by Shauna James Ahern a.k.a. "The Gluten-Free Girl." Here's a quote from Ms. Ahern's blog post today that really struck home with me. It's quite lengthy, but bear with me.

"Even if you are wobbly at the stove or awkward at chopping or feel annoyed or pressured to be perfect when you cook? Give it time. You’ll find it.

Cooking is connection. It’s not about impressing. It’s about pausing from the chopping to lean your head down toward the board and breathe in the released smell of fresh cilantro. (If you don’t like cilantro, make it basil.) Cooking is about concentrating with an intent focus on something that’s in your hands and your heart, instead of your head. You can slip the day from your shoulders when you cook. You can let it all go. Start slicing the garlic.

If you feel like you don’t have time to cook, because your life is so busy (and believe me, we know busy), take a step back.

Eating great food that you know is gluten-free is your path to healing. Cooking for yourself or your hilarious friends or your kids is a gift you give. Sitting at the table with people is where the stories emerge, the relaxation takes place, the memories are formed. Why don’t you have time for this?

Your entire life is going to change because of this. You might as well allow it to happen fully. Arrange your life differently so you have a little time in the evening to cook.

You don’t want to miss this."

Wow. I've been struggling with a lot of things this year. I've had to morn the loss of friendships because of some life-changing decisions which we had to make (I won't go into those decisions here), and I've yearned to have people over. To have friends to share our life with. Don't get me wrong, Donnie and I have a great relationship. We talk more in one evening than most couples probably talk in days or possibly weeks. We talk about everything. Donnie and I also have 4 beautiful children that challenge and uplift us. But there's just something about having a close friend (or two) that you can share burdens and blessings with. We, like most homeschooling families, have been so busy this year. Especially this year! Being our first year of homeschooling has definitely stretched me to my physical limits. I have been battling the symptoms of Celiac Disease silently (for the most part) because I have no one who really would listen (other than my wonderful husband). My Mom is consumed (and rightfully so) by the needs of my Dad who is a 100 % medically retired veteran. My sister is also a homeschooling mother of 3 kids (who are older and involved in more things than my kids). But enough whining!

I'm ready to start getting my life in order. I can't wait to feel the beneficial affects (effects - I'm sorry. English grammar/composition has always been my stumbling block. But hey! It's a cooking blog, right?! Not a grammar blog!) of going GF! I can't wait to play with my children this summer without having to rest every 15-30 minutes. I'm ready to eat without feeling miserable. I eagerly looking forward to trying new recipes...

So hopefully, sometime in the near future, you will see pictures on this blog. Hopefully some recipes too. Many, I'm sure, will be from other fabulous GF blogs (to whom I will always give credit), but hopefully, many will be my own creations. I can't wait to give this gift to my family, my future friends, and to myself!

Still eating gluten...and miserable.

Well, last Friday I went to a gastroenterologist for the first time. She was wonderful! If you need a referral, just leave a comment and I'll get the info to you. Anyway, she does believe that I have Celiac Disease, but would like to take a biopsy for confirmation. While I am sedated for the biopsy of the small intestines, she's going to go ahead and check my esophagus for any problems since I have had some issues with acid too. I say get it all done at once so I don't have to be sedated again!

As per the gastro's instructions, I am still eating gluten at this time. If I stop taking in gluten then my body will begin to heal and thus I may receive a false negative in the scope procedure. It's difficult to keep eating something that you think might be causing your body to attack itself. In the meantime, I am eating gluten and I'm miserable.

I have just recently found the Whole Foods website that I'm sure so many people have already discovered. FA.BU.LOUS! Since Donnie is type 2 diabetic, we need to make some definite changes in our eating habits...for good! I have just started collecting recipes for things that we can all eat and enjoy. Our oldest son is allergic to eggs too. So basically I'm looking for gluten-free, egg-free, sugar-free recipes that taste good. It sounds like a challenge, but I think I'm up for it! Good thing I love to cook and experiment in the kitchen. The only problem is that most of the gluten-free flours, etc. are so expensive. So in the meantime, we're going to be eating a lot of lean meats, veggies and fruit. Sounds good to me! Especially since summertime is just around the corner! Can't wait to grill some chicken and steak along with some veggies! I have to say that I've always hated fish/seafood, but I recently saw a cooking show that featured some salmon that was grilled on a cedar plank. The salmon looked incredibly delicious, so I think I'm going to give it a try.

Looking forward to having that test done on June 1st so that I can begin my gluten-free journey. Of course we're leaving for vacation AFTER I get the test done. Of course we're not going on vacation before I go gluten-free. That would be too easy. This ought to be a challenge. I'm doing as much research about the place we're going to on vacation so that I can plan as much as possible. We have learned to adapt well to Gavin's egg allergy, so I'm sure this is just a matter of getting even better at reading food labels. One thing that I've gained since I've started looking at labels for gluten is a renewed interest in what I'm putting into my body (and into my children's bodies!). Which leads my random thinking to this thought...

Donnie recently rented a movie (for free at Family Video because it's a documentary) called, "Food, Inc." Very interesting. I'm going to check it out again. It was quite a bit to absorb in one viewing. It may also be available at your local library. There are 6 copies at our library, and they are all checked out! I wish we had more land so that we could have our own garden. I'd love to grow our own vegetables and fruit and have some chickens too. And maybe some honeybees too. I certainly hope I have more energy when I go gluten-free with all the dreams that I have for our family...